metro 29

so i go to the metro 29 diner last night for dinner with john and the football (cuz thats how we roll). as john put it, it was a manhattan sandwich trifecta. what is a manhattan sandwich, you ask? simply put, it is love on a plate. if you haven't experienced it, i highly recommend you get yourself one. mmm mmmmmm biatch....for real.

i'm having trouble with the fact that the diner is switching to an all non-smoking environment for my health on 1/1/06. whats the point in ordering the gut buster if you can't have a cigarette afterwards? oh, the disappointment of it all.

anyway, after dinner, i left and went home to get some sleep. i have to work on saturdays, you know. john and the football headed off to nation to play with fat girls. i'll have to see how that worked out for them.

primetime

so i was waiting for eric to get home so we could try to start the volvo (success), and get it to the shop (mission accomplished). so while im waiting, i watched primetime on ABC. usually i stay away from shows like that because i'm an uppity bastard.

and then they showed it. the papal nut-verification chair. seriously. i thought religion was funny before, but now i've realized its an absolute riot. the deal is this....it seems that some historians believe that there was a pope con vag. she pretended to be a man but got caught 2 years later when she had a kid.

in order to make sure that such a scandal never happened again, they had this funny looking chair that kinda looked like a toilet seat.....some sort of pope-nut-verifier would reach under the chair to make sure that the new incoming pope was sporting the goods. sounds kinda gay, doesn't it?

the battleship, continued

so last night i was supposed to take the volvo to the shop to get it serviced and inspected. well, the jump-box at work was dead, so that wasn't gonna help me. so tonight i brought home jumper cables. when eric gets home, we'll try to get the car started. exactly how many gays does it take to get a 1993 940 wagon running?

i spent my lunch break reading the abramoff thingy in the washington post. well, it was almost the entire washington post today. god that guy is a douche. i wish randi was back on the air...i think she comes back on monday. i miss my queen of air america.

thats all for now, chirrens....i'm going outside for a smoke.

oops

so, let me get this straight. a ramp worker bumped his little buggy into an alaska airlines plane, and didn't report it???

first off....hey douchebag, if you crash into the plane, perhaps you might want to let someone know about it!!!

second...i am a very skittish passenger. i'll admit it. i don't like to fly. i love to travel, but i hate getting on the plane. right before they call my section for boarding, i start eating xanax like pez. i am traveling to dallas next month, and then brussels in march. so just so i'm clear on this....a little goddamned bump in the side of the plane caused a loss of cabin pressure and an emergency landing? doesn't that seem extreme? i would think that it would take a little more than a bump or something. the slightest bit of turbulence and i'm gonna be snorting my xanax pills off my tray that is supposed to be kept in an upright position.


ps....a special thank you to princess sparkle pony for posting a comment on here. i bow at your sparkly hooves.

word.

random

so, i went to the MVA to get the battleship registered. while i was circling the parking lot looking for a space, i saw a black E55 AMG double parked on the side of the building. now, there aren't that many of those cars around, so of course i knew it was frank. totally random to run into someone at the MVA. made passing the time a little bit easier.

anyway, after 3 hours i was able to leave with registration and tags. everyone keep your paws crossed that the car passes inspection. otherwise, i have to find sascha a new chariot.

MVA and other fun things

well, i'm off to the MVA to get the volvo registered. since sascha fartypants is not allowed to ride in the new car, i have to get my old battleship on the road. hopefully i won't have to sit there for hours, i do need to be at work around 1ish.

john has graciously agreed to put together a sascha gastric distress color-coded terror alert chart (similar to the one used for homeland security and condi's hair). i know you kitties are all waiting for that, so keep on the lookout....i'll have it up here as soon as i can.

cheers for now.

blog envy?

ok, both john and princess sparkle pony have been quite active in the past 24 hours, yet i've had nothing important to report. all i've done is work and watch i love the 80s on vh-1. i am going to need to do something interesting just so i can write about it.

at least NPR had a david sedaris story on last night. that, and celebrity fit club starts again soon. rock on.

back in '98

my friend dina found a picture of me with my first doberman, hannah. this would have been taken around 08/98 in iowa city.

hannah passed away in december of 2001 after a long battle with renal dysplaysia.

i miss you, sweet girl.

superman and other things

well, the washington blade has reported that there is an issue with the new superman. specifically the superhero package. apparently it is a little too noticeable for the movie studio. i mean really, they are treating this like it is a bad thing.

Turns out the new Superman is super in all the right places.
In the upcoming movie "Superman Returns," sexy newcomer BRANDON ROUTH, 26, plays the Krypton refugee.
According to British tabloid the Sun, Routh's sizeable package is causing trouble with studio honchos. The paper reports that Superman's red panty bulge when viewed in profile could be distracting to audiences when the film is released this June.
The Sun quotes an anonymous source saying, "It's a major issue for the studio. Brandon is extremely well-endowed and they don't want it up on the big screen." What pea-brained Hollywood executives think that this "problem" isn't going to sell tickets?
Supposedly, these Brainiacs have asked the filmmakers — including the film's gay director, "X-Men" vet BRYAN SINGER — to digitally shrink the hero's manly attributes. In anticipation of a sequel, Dish hears wardrobe people have already fitted Routh with a kryptonite codpiece to foil super sausage's threatening powers.

seeing that its now $10.50 for a movie ticket here, i expect some "distraction".

now on to the other thing i feel compelled to discuss. john has turned me on to princess sparkleponys blog. my favorite thing on there is hairdo alert system for condoleezza rice. even though others have posted the picture as well, i felt that there was a void here that needed to be filled. so, enjoy.

hannukah ham

good times, kids. the christmas party was fun.


i thought this was a pretty good picture, so there you go. eric is preparing the traditional hannukah ham. shalom!

crimmis party

in honor of the time old jewish tradition, i am going to a family christmas party. my aunts throw one every year. as soon as seth gets here, we are heading out to VA to go party hard with the rogin/parker crew.

work was kind of quiet.....i thought it would be busier.

saschas current gastric status: less farty than yesterday

jesus is magic

somehow i managed to forget to profess my love for sarah silverman, so i figure i better do it now while i'm thinking about it.




sarah, thank you for making the funniest movie i have ever seen. if only you had a penis and weren't sleeping with jimmy kimmel. sigh.

ok, well, i need to get ready for work. i got bills to pay, boo.

houstons

2 jack and cokes and some dinner. bitchin.

the situation room

i am not happy with the current cnn lineup. way too much wolf blitzer, if you ask me. and while i know that anderson cooper is the guy, honestly i wish i had aaron brown back.

as if we didn't need further proof that we really do need regime change at home, the washington post has reported that sam alito supported wiretap immunity. kids, i can't make this shit up. you can read the article if you don't believe me. i'm just glad that the dems have finally started to stand up to bush and co. i would like an indictment for each night of hannukah. that would make it the most super holiday ever.

well, i managed to get all the gifts i needed. i had to be lame with a few of them and do e-gift certificates, but what can you do? i did not plan well for this holiday season.

i hope eric gets home soon. we are going for dinner and i'm ready to chew my arm off.

and for those that are curious, sascha is particularly farty today.

waiting until the last minute

i am headed back to the mall to finish up my holiday shopping. luckily i have prescriptions for valium AND xanax. i'll probably need both. the stores are probably packed with all the other crazies looking for last minute gifts.

a shout out to the K-O-P

i do realize that i've now posted 3 times in the past hour, but dammit, i have a lot to say and this blogging thing is addictive as hell.

now i'm sure you are wondering what the K-O-P is. well, let me tell you.....it is the King of Prussia Mall (its either in, near, or around valley forge, pa). since eric and i had gone to pennsylvania to look at puppies, we figured we might as well go shopping since the dog thing didn't quite work out.

i am not a good shopper. i tend to get very over-stressed in the mall, and nothing ever fits right. i wear a 37 sleeve, so try finding that at your local goddamned macys.

anyway, lets get back to the shout out. or props. whatever. i will readily admit that most objects of my affection are younger than i am. i'm 33, and typically if you bust me staring at dudes walking by, they are like 20. thats what i like to look at, so get over it, mmmkay? we all have our thing, and mine happens to have been born anywhere from 1980-1985.

i am not sure if they have a factory in valley forge where they just grow hot hot hot 20 year olds and then let them loose in the mall, but it was spectacular. everywhere i looked there was hotness to be seen.

i really thought my mall experience couldn't get any better. but it did. yes, dear reader, it did.

as we are coming around the corner to head out, we pass by the A&F store. now, i am well aware of my physical limitations as well as my age, so i would never even consider going into that store. but of course, you HAVE to look at the displays when you walk by. the hot posters everywhere, and of course, the hotties coming in and out of the store.

and then i saw him. a real A&F model. in nothing but low riding jeans. 8 pack. perfect. treasure trail. perfect. biceps. perfect. i'm sure his name was either brandon or justin or jason or tyler, etc etc...you know the kind of guy i mean, so don't act like you don't.

they were having some sort of promotion, and it included a goddamned live model at the entrance to the store.

luckily, i have no shame. so i stared. and walked away. and came back and stared some more. and walked away. and came back and stared again. unfortunately i did have a shred of tact, so i didn't take a picture of him. but i should have. in fact, i should have gone out to the car, gotten my digital camera, and come back and done a goddamned photo shoot.

king of prussia, i love you. except for the manager at the coach store. she was a twat and i didn't get the wallet i wanted.

the lady and the panda

as a side note, in honor of tai-shan (or butterstick if you prefer), i decided to read "the lady and the panda". it was brilliant. and on my blog, thats all that counts, buddy.

you can buy the book here, if you so choose.

bow wow wow yippee yo yippee yay

well, the puppy expedition did not result in instant gratification. they showed me some available female dobermans, but none of them were what i was looking for. the first one they offered was a little aggressive and bossed the other puppies around....since sascha is not a dominant dog, i didn't think that one would work out. they showed me a second puppy, but she wasn't much into playing and didn't really seem to connect with me.

finally, they bring out this sweet red puppy....her tail was wagging and right away she was licking my face. when the other one barked and growled at her, she just sat down....didn't fight back or anything. so of course, i'm thinking "perfect". but, unfortunately this dog hadn't been cared for properly by her previous family (she was 12 weeks old, the others were 9 weeks). i called my vet to discuss the situation, and he recommended not taking that dog since she could have the potential for so many problems later.

so, i left a deposit, and they have more puppies coming the first week of january. i'll go back up and take a look. hopefully sascha will have a little sister by the end of jan. if you want to see, you can look at the kennels website.

puppies

i'm going to look at puppies this morning. i am pretty sure that sascha is lonely and would like a little sister to play with. the breeder is in PA, so we are going to schlep up there and take a look. i have to confess, i'm a little annoyed that they raised their prices.....my hebraic sensibilities are in an uproar.

cnn just announced that rummy is in baghdad. i wish he'd stay there. praise allah.

sascha the clinically overweight doberman

this is my little fatty. she is on a diet....i know she looks sleek and svelte in the pic, but she is 122lb. i need to get her down to 100lb with a quickness. i wish NBC would do a "biggest loser, canine edition". that would make life easier for all involved.

ok so here it is

right. so, this is my first posting so i'm going to take a minute to introduce myself.


my name is andrew, and i live in kensington, maryland. i bought my house here last year at the height of the real estate frenzy, so i'm pretty well screwed on that front. jobwise, i am a sales manager at a big import car dealership (hence thecardaddy). the picture you see here is of me in my new car. its a mercedes-benz E320-CDI. kinda bitchin, and it gets 40mpg. take that, riyadh.

i'm 33, single and live with an overweight doberman pinscher named sascha. she is very sweet and friendly. i'll put a picture of her on here too. also, my friend eric lives with me, although i don't have a picture of him to post on here.

other things you might like to know (because i know you are fascinated by me already)
1. jew. but not overly jewy. i have a weakness for bagels, lox, latkes and chopped liver, but i'm not so keen on the whole temple/torah/no bacon part of it.
2. homo. there might have been something in the water in east windsor, nj where i grew up. lotsa homos sprouted from that town. yes, i have the accent and east windsor is exit 8 on the turnpike.
3. lefty liberal politics obsessed air america radio loving npr listening cracka.
4. valium is the best invention ever. the guy that invented it just bit it a few months ago. he should be elevated to saint or god or whatever.
5. i have a slight temper. hard to believe, but i do. i usually keep it in check, but usually at the most inconvenient moment i will completely lose my cool.
6. sleater-kinney is the best band ever.
7. i pretty much know the words to every song courtney love has ever recorded. while i know that # 6 says sleater-kinney is the best band ever, courtney is a close # 2. and you can put that in your pipe and smoke it.
8. walk the line is one of the best movies i've seen in a long time.
9. the wheel of fortune slot machine is more addictive than oxycontin and crack combined.